Reflections of ourselves

Today has been one hell of a day. I keep trying to work my way out from under my impending deadlines, but my attention and thoughts are continuously drawn back to the shootings at Virginia Tech. Going through the morning news, I didn’t take too much notice of a headline mentioning a shooting death at a Virginia college, especially given the disturbing yet numbing regularity of shootings lately. As a society, we’re reaching a point where single shootings, regardless of the context, fade quickly from the news and our thoughts, even quicker when they occur far away (excepting, of course, instances where the victim is young, attractive and white).  I was shocked when the headline changed to 20 dead, dismayed watching the casualty count mounting as information trickled in and more victims died.

The role taken by the media in times of tragedy is often fascinating – they alternate expressing heartfelt sympathy and providing information with searching for ways to both justify and magnify what occurred. It is the desire for justification that seems most human for me; we all have an inherent desire to remove the specter random death and pain from our lives. Its deeply disturbing to be confronted with the reality that such acts can and do occur, and are largely beyond our control. The most prominent questions at the news conferences were not about who or how, they were about why.  A collective search for the sense behind a series of senseless acts, not only in terms of the killer’s motivations and mindset  but also in the response of authorities, and their perceived failure to prevent the murders. I think the desire the find incompetence on the part of those in power stems for our need to be reassured that further acts are preventable and that this one was caused human error, not random chance or the inherent impossibility of protecting everyone from everything.

Watching and reading the news coverage throughout the day, I was amazed at how quickly the incident was framed in terms of different people’s viewpoints. I hesitate to say agendas, even though a significant portion of the commentary immediately turned to gun control, with both sides posting arguments as to why their positions would have prevented the killings.  While I’m sure there was an element of pushing for political gain, my shock over what happen has stripped some of my cynicism and takes me back to the idea of people searching for security amidst chaos.  There will be elements of blaming a lack of gun control for enabling the killings, or a lack of concealed-carry permits for preventing anyone from shooting back, or overly permissive immigration policies for allowing the shooter in the country.  These arguments will be for political gain, yes, but also out of an unstated belief that senseless acts such as this are partially the fault of those preventing our idealized world from coming into being.

There is a great human need to find justification and reason in the chaos that can wash over our everyday lives.  The absense of reason in the face of tragedy breeds confusion and uncertainty, and as the dust settles we find not reason but the reflections of our own anger, prejudice and fear.

Earthquake

Last week I was reading a comic book on my black leather bachelor couch when I heard a low rumbling sound, kind of like a dump truck driving down the basement stairs.  It lasted just long enough to get my attention before the house started shaking.  A 3.6 earthquake hit frickin’ Cleveland, which is not exactly a geologically active area.  It wasn’t that big or long of an earthquake, maybe five seconds long and barely enough to make the glasses rattle, but still…it did prompt one of those “are we under attack?” moments.  I have an old army rucksack with some survival supplies in the basement, a couple of gallons of water, and 500 cans of beets and other weird things that no one in my house will ever eat but occasionally get bought anyway.  I guess the impulse buy theory there is something along the lines of “Hey, beets!” I’m not sure how I would react in the event of an actual invasion by Canada though.  I’d probably make fun of their little mountie hats.

A radio DJ commented that his thoughts briefly mirrored mine: “Is this the end?  Do I have to step up and be a real man now?  I’m not ready for that!”  I know that there are all kinds of precautions you are supposed to take in case some kind of disaster hits, especially after the mess that was Katrina.  But at the same time, its really hard to rationalize doing some of them.  Some are easy, like having lots of blankets and a few flashlights, a first aid kit and the like.  But some of the hoarding recommendations make me feel ridiculous.  Consequently, in the event of a complete breakdown resulting in the loss of all utilities, I will be surviving on 2 gallons of water, a case of diet pepsi and a significantly greater volume of booze.  Dinner will consist of some beets, uncooked pasta and a 64 ounce container of taco seasoning.